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December 14th, 2009


02:19 pm - Love Me Some Paula Deen! Part 2
Holiday Cocktail Party

Italian Chicken Sticks
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Cheese-Stuffed Mushrooms
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Creme de Menthe Brownies
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Cherries Jubilee
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Lemon Apple Cider
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Southern Holiday

Hidden Mint Cookies
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Gingerbread Cookies
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Monster Cookies
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Sugar Shack

Pecan Pralines
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Bruleed Banana Split
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Lollipops
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Peanut Butter Cups in a Blanket
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Delicious Gifts

Taco Chili Mix
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English Toffee
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Southwestern Dip
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Five-Layer Bars
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Chocolate Fever

Three Chocolate Cookies
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Fudge Pie
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Chocolate Grand Marnier Souffle
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Breakfast in Bed

Spicy Cinnamon Cake
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Spinach-Gruyere Puff Pastries
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Dutch-Apple Pancake
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Under the Sea

Crab Martini
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Salmon from My Garden
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Bouillabaisse
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Wild Rice and Oyster Casserole
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Southern Thanksgiving

Deep Fried Turkey
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Gooey Buttercake
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Southern Cornbread Dressing
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Happy Hour

Squash-and-Zucchini Cakes
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Sweet-and-Sour Meatballs
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Cajun-Fried Okra with Chili Sauce
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Sherbet Punch
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Comfort Food

Beef Stew
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Potato Casserole
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Chocolate Bread Pudding
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(Leave a comment)

December 4th, 2009


01:29 am - So... New Moon... Huh...
Is it weird that I don't really care for New Moon except for the last 30 minutes or so? Because I've seen that last 30 min, like, seven times. The rest of it? Couldn't care less. Michael Sheen comes in with that really awful wig... what is it with these movies and bad wigs? No, seriously? That one guy from Sweeney Todd in the blond wig who never gets up? When was that hairstyle ever a good idea? When was that considered a good look for him? You'd think in the handful of centuries he's been around, someone would've been all "You realize that hair makes you look super gay? And not in a good, 'Tim Gunn and Simon Doonan approve' way. It's more 'Would totally make Liberace cringe it's so flamboyent'. No offense."

And why do the Italian Mafia vamps have British accents? Aren't they Italian? I mean, their names are. Well, they're Roman. As in Rome. As in the Roman Fucking Empire. I know that Rome once held Britain, but you've lived in Italy for a millenium. You clearly speak some Italian, or Latin, Michael-Sheen-in-a-fucking-awful-wig-with-that-fucking-awful-widow's-peak. Where's your accent? Who are you, fucking Antonio Banderas or Arnold Schwarzenegger? Or did you continuously subject yourself to some hellish boy's school like Eton until the accent was mercilessly teased from you?

All these questions, and I would still rather watch just that part over and over than sit through the whole movie again.

And what the hell was up with some creepy old ladies sitting behind me actually fucking QUIVERED when Jacob took his shirt off the first time? They kicked my seat in joy. No joke. My friend took this deep breath and was all, "You see?! Awesome!" And I'm like, "I see a really awful wig on a shirtless 16 year old, you pedo." Then he got a haircut, and I was no longer distracted from the ridiculously cut man-child's body, which successfully distracted me from his awkward nose.

To the women over 25 in the audience: You are all fucking sick. Go read grown-up dirty-girl books and stop pedo-ing 17 year old boys. If you are more than 10 years older than the man you're gushing over, and he's a minor which makes him NOT A MAN, just fucking stop. Don't be that woman. You know, the one who turns out to be that one friend's desperate mother that everyone made fun of because she couldn't seem to control herself around her kid's hot friends? Yeah, don't be her. That woman ends up like Mary Kay Latourneau. Then again, you are weird enough to want that. After all, you're a 30+ year-old woman reading bad Mary Sue-fanfiction that's been adapted into a less-than-stellar movie whose underage actor you are perving over. Good luck with the therapy bills your children will be charging to you.

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01:05 am - Love Me Some Paula Deen!
Running out of room on my DVR!

Episode: SOUTHERN FAVORITES!

BBQ Pork Sandwich
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Corn Fritters
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Kentucky Pie
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Episode: Garden Delights!

Garden Full of Goodness Lasagna
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Chicken and Asparagus Crepes
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Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bread
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Watermelon Cooler
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Episode: It's My Party!

Scallop Burger Sliders with a Cilantro-Lime Mayo
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Chicken Empanadas
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Petit Fours
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Butter Poached Lobster Shooters
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Episode: After-School Snacks!

Mini Veggie Pizzas
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Apple Raisin Mini Muffins
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Popcorn Balls
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Pretzel Peanut Bark
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Episode: Dinner on the Deck!

Shrimp Po'Bubbas
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Lobster Rolls
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Coleslaw
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Chocolate Chip Pie
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Episode: Thanksgiving!

Honey-Glazed Game Hen
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Oven-Roasted Red Potatoes with Rosemary and Garlic
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Fried Green Bean Bundles
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Cranberry Sauce
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Pumpkin Gingerbread Trifle
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Episode: Apple a Day!

Grilled Apple, Bacon and Cheddar Sandwich
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Apple Stuffed Pork Loin Roast
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Apple Strudel
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Episode: Berry Good!

Filet Mignon with Blackberry Sauce
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Lime Blueberry Tiramisu
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Raspberry Sorbet
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Pecan Stuffed Berries with Cream Cheese

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Episode: Fry Me to the Moon!

Fried Collard-Green Wontons
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Fried Halibut Sandwiches
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Crab Hushpuppies
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Deep-Fried Cheesecake

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Episode: Country Comfort!

Biscuits and Gravy
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Bacon-Cheeseburger Meatloaf
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Poblano-Chicken Chowder
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(Leave a comment)

June 23rd, 2009


11:48 pm - ALCOHOL!
Drinks that I desperately want to try:

Future Ex
Sage Lady
Vodka Creme Brulee
Pog Punch
Sangria Blanco
Island Blossom
Sage, Elderflower, and Cucumber White Sangria
Honey Lemon Drop
Royal 61
Glitz & Glamour
Rosemary Lemon Fizz
Midnight Kiss


(Leave a comment)

June 16th, 2009


05:16 pm - Oh the Drama
I'm being put even further in the middle in the Eliss/Jophus situation, because when things get screwed up (when Eliss screws up) the first person Joe or Greg calls is me, and because she is attached to my hip I can't have a real conversation (read: bitchfest) with them.  She complains about the way she is, but doesn't do anything to change.  I am really afraid that eventually I'm going to have to choose beteen the two of them, and I honestly don't know who I would choose.  Eliss and I have been through so much together but she drives me crazy, and Joe is so amazing and I'm so thankful to have him in my life but he's always so busy that sometimes we just don't have the time for each other.  They're both great people, and I don't want to have to choose.
Current Location: home
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated
Current Music: Secret Machines

(Leave a comment)

04:54 pm - She Drives Me Crazy
So, my friend just moved in with me, and I thought, "It'll be different than it was over winter break, because this time she actually has a job and won't be surgically attached to my ass."  But work has cut back her hours and she's been with me almost 24/7 since she arrived.  I've tried to give us some time apart by hanging out in another room, tooling around on the computer, reading, etc.  But somehow, she doesn't seem to understand that if I'm around her constantly I will eventually try to kill her, so she always tracks me down wherever I am and decides to hang out.  I go up to my room and after a little while she follows me up!  God love her, but I feel like I'm in constant PMS mode, and I'm about to flip.  She eats every few hours, and not just little snacks or something, but hot dogs and Mac&Cheese, half a box of Triscuits, a couple of Bagelfuls.  Mom just bought $300 worth of groceries, and because there's one more person eating now I'm trying to limit myself to one or two small meals a day, but she doesn't seem to understand that she can't eat every time she gets the smallest craving.

We also went through a brief pregnancy scare, but now she's on her period and is cranky on top of everything else.  I don't know what to do any more.  I wish she would get transfered to the downtown Logan's so she would get more hours, but she keeps putting off asking her boss.  And now I'm kinda between her and my other best friend, whom she has kinda pissed off, and that's just one more thing to deal with.  GAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Current Location: home
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated
Current Music: Secret Machines

(Leave a comment)

June 12th, 2009


12:43 am - Greatest Ambitions In Life
  • To be Doogie Howser, M.D.
  • To be a good, famous novelist
  • To own a shop that sells miniatures of miniatures
  • To be an interior decorator
  • To be a fabulous housewife with semi well-behaved children and a good attractive husband with a fabulous income to support my lavish yet tasteful lifestyle
  • To be a famous, well-respected actress
  • To be the world's first tattooing skydiver (I tattoo people while skydiving)
  • To work in the creative department of any of my favorite magazines
  • To be a drag queen
  • To be a movie critic
  • To be a concert/ music festival critic
  • To be a permanent, non-loser, welcome fixture at Comic-Con (Because all my favorite men seem to show up there eventually so it seems like a solid husband-catching plan)
  • To be indispensable to someone, preferably a good-looking, good-humored, kind-natured, intelligent, upper-income straight man who will see me for the utterly amazing woman that I am, even if I can be a little shallow
  • To be happy with myself more often
  • To come to terms with the fact that I'll probably never be what my mother wants, whatever that may be
  • To be the secret lovechild of Brock Sampson and Cover Girl, or Baroness, because both women are kick-ass and too hot for the Joes
  • To be Fran Fine with an even better wardrobe, with less whine and more drawl
  • To marry well and wisely, and never need a divorce; especially if he gets me to sign a pre-nup
  • To be careful, if not good
  • To be someone I'd be thrilled to know.  Oh, wait, there's one I can check off!

Current Location: home
Current Mood: peacefulpeaceful
Current Music: Sixty-Minute Man - The Dominoes

(Leave a comment)

May 31st, 2009


03:23 pm - Just An Attempt to Keep Track and Not Overlap
The Fabulous Miss B's Musical Extravaganza 1

Psycho Killer - The Talking Heads
Never Changing - New Heights
Look At September, Look At October - Daniel Land & the Modern Painters
Interstate Love Song - Stone Temple Pilots
Heart Attack - Low vs. Diamond
Free Fallin' - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
Don't Drink the Water - Stone Gods
Burn It Down - Kat McGivern
Bad Things - Jace Everett
100 Days, 100 Nights - Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings

TFMBME 2

La Boheme - Natalie Nahai
How Your Heart Is Wired - Bell X1
Girl In the War - Josh Ritter
End of the World - Black, Star, and Frost
Change ft. Wale - Daniel Merriweather
Because It's Not Love (But It's Still A Feeling) - The Pipettes
100 In a 55 - Pop Evil
Wasp's Nest - Tellison
Steal Your Fire - Lauren Harris
She Makes Me Fall Down - Buva

TFMBME 3


Gossip Queen - The Inferno Merchants
Erehwon - Akayzia
Choke - Hybrid
Beautiful Again - Stillife
You're the Only One - Maria Mena
Turn You On - The P"e'aks
Someone Saved My Life Tonight - Elton John
Sally Cinnamon - Stone Roses
Piece of Me - Britney Spears
Mary Jane's Last Dance - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

TFMBME 4

Cold Ground - Rusty Truck
Elevator - Hot Hot Heat
The Broken Minor - Elliot Minor
The Arcade - Hyper Crush
Will You Sort Me Out - Frame 3-13
Sway (Quien Sera) - Dean Martin
Siobhan - The Tossers
Never For My Sake - Shaun
Like There Ain't No Yesterday - BlackHawk
I'm In Love With You - Joy Williams

TFMBME 5

Delilah - Dirty Sweet
Blind Man - Black Stone Cherry
Acid Tongue - Jenny Lewis
Umbrella - Rihanna
So Wrong For Me - Cory Chisel & the Wandering Sons
Rich and Famous - Valerie
Of All the Wonderful Things - Piney
Lollipop - Framing Hanley
I'm Moving On - Rascal Flatts
Good Evening - Outasight

TFMBME 6

The Little Things - Danny Elfman
Don't Lose Touch - Against Me
Bond Girl - The Rascals
Afterglow - INXS
Undone (The Sweater Song) - Weezer
So Perfect - Life in Art
Resistance - Red Letter Kill
New Year - The Leaf Library
Higher Then - Mellow the Band
Friday I'm In Love - The Cure

TFMBME 7

Great DJ - The Ting Tings
Devil In Disguise - Slidin' Slim
Bloody Bunnies - Gram Rabbit
Young Folks - Peter Bjorn and John
This Year's Love - David Grey
She's So Selfish - The Knack
Plush - Stone Temple Pilots
Love Vibration - Josh Rouse
In Step - GirlTalk
Gotta Be Somebody - Nickelback

TFMBME 8

Fee Da Da Dee - The Guggenheim Grotto
Love Me Dead - Ludo
I Still Ain't Over You - Augustana
Follow that Sound - Sharon Little
Closer - Kings of Leon
Anna Marie ft Shezar - Palladium
What Katie Did - Baby Shambles
Some Voices - Pinback
The Queen and I - Gym Class Heroes
Moment of the Year - The Doubtful Guest

TFMBME 9

Summerlong - Kathleen Edwards
Rock & Roll Queen - The Subways
My Life Would Suck Without You - Kelly Clarkson
Just What I Needed - The Cars
Fuck Her Better - Kill the Reflection
Cold - Crossfade
Aurora - Your Vegas
What I Have Left - Mike Bones
Sky Larkin - Wichita
Puppets - Atmosphere

TFMBME 10


Forty Dollars - Maggie
Burn Bright - Shine Down
Runaway - Abilene
A Stroke of Genius - 2 Many DJ's
Renegade - STYX
Main Theme [True Romance] - Hans Zimmer
How to Lose Your Best Friend - Archangel
The Fear - Lily Allen
Break Free - Panjea
You're So Vain - Carly Simon

TFMBME 11

Love Etc - Pet Shop Boys
Travel In Time - Marching Band
Scotty Doesn't Know - Lustra
Many Shades of Black - The Raconteursr
Here's Goodbye - Gone By Daylight
End of the World - Matt Alber
Believer - Jonathan Ebbs
Waterloo - ABBA
She Goes Out With Everybody - The Spongetones
No You Girls - Franz Ferdinand

TFMBME 12

Razorblade - The Strokes
Let Love In - The Goo Goo Dolls
Good Bye - Tuesday
Breathe - Abe
Whole Lotta Love - Lez Zeppelin
Singin' In the Rain - Mint Royale
Never Been to Spain - Three Dog Night
I Will Learn to Love Again - Kaci Battaglia
Everyone's At It - Lily Allen
Ballad of a Thin Man - Stephen Malkmus & the Million Dollar Bashers

TFMBME 13

She's A Knockout - Daniel Ward-Murphy
Love Lockdown - Kanye West
Great Expectations - The Gaslight Anthem
Blossoms and Blood - Deadly Avenger
Trust Fund Girl - Velvet Code
The Puzzle - Ane Brun
Ladies and Gentlemen - Hot Hot Heat
Fly With You - Pete Murray
Bitch - Ashley MacIsaac
The Thrill of Thirty Seconds - Skint & Demoralised

TFMBME 14

I Told You So - Carrie Underwood
Coffee Kiss - Shane Alexander
Sweet Kiss - V Sparks
Pay Tomorrow - Tim Exile
Hello To You - Rose Rossi
When Did Your Heart Go Missing - Rooney
Pink Sabbath - DANANANANAYKROYD
I've Got Friends - Manchester Orchestra
Desafinado - Nina Perrson
Wonderland - Sidewalk Gray

TFMBME 15

Blindness - Metric
American Girl - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
Señor - Willie Nelson
Hidden Hand Hidden Fist - STS9
Blah Blah Blah - Sliced Peach
Space Oddity - David Bowie
Love Her Madly - The Doors
Womanizer - Britney Spears
Ricochet - Shiny Toy Guns
I'm Yours - Jason Mraz

TFMBME 16

Open Up Your Eyes - Hatiras
Fake - Alex Roots
A Story To Tell Your Friends - Every Avenue
Know One - Cottrell Gantt
Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered - Ella Fitzgerald
She Gets Me High - Rick Huckaby
Hang On Sloopy - The McCoys
Ain't That A Kick in the Head - Dean Martin
Purr La Perla - Violet Indiana
Hallelujah - Sara Gazarek

TFMBME 17

An Honest Mistake - The Bravery
Only for Today - Pete Miser
Come On Get Higher - Matt Nathanson
Sittin' On the Dock of the Bay - Otis Redding
Ghost Town - Shiny Toy Guns
When You're Dead - Darlings of the Day
Knife - Grizzly Bear
With or Without Me (Soulwax Remix) - 2 Many DJ's
Love Remains the Same - Gavin Rossdale
Both Back - The Summer Brothers

TFMBME 18

Find A New Way - Young Love
Photobooth - Friendly Fires
Cecilia - Simon & Garfunkel
La Pastie de La Bourgeoisie - Belle & Sebastian
Suspicious Minds - Elvis Presley
Kiss Me Again (Stuttering) - Ben's Brother
The Whole Hog - Benny Hotel
Live Your Life Freestyle - Code Red
After Hours - We Are Scientists
Monster's Waltz - The Invisible

TFMBME 19

Destiny - Lunar Fiction
Myth of Beauty - Melissa Cupernall
Stay With Me - Josh Gracin
Only Women Bleed - Alice Cooper
Grounds for Divorce - Elbow
Eleanor Rigby - Doxology
From My Heart To Yours - Laura Izibor
Heartbreaker - The Section Quartet
Running - Laura Steele
SuperGirl - Saving Jane

TFMBME 20

Summer Holiday - Chris Isaak
Jump In the Line - Harry Belafonte
Everybody Knows - John Legend
Fire and Rain - James Taylor
Singin' in the Rain - Gene Kelly
Somewhere Over the Rainbow - Israel
Come On - Air Traffic
Smiles -
Africa - Toto
Song Without Words - Shokolat

TFMBME 21

I'm Confused - Handsome Furs
Solstice - Jolly
Apple Pie - Coco Electrik
Como Tu - Ines
People Grow From Trees - Kevin M. Kirker
There's Nothing Left of Me - Tim Exile
Prettiest Waitress in Memphis - Cory Branan
1054 - Umbrella Tree
Colours - Brenn
Major Tom (Extended Mix) - Pete Schilling

TFMBME 22

Wicked Game - Ruby James
Little Man - Brian Van Der Ark
Don't Give Up - ketmusik
Miracle - John David Webster
Young Traveller v2 - Georgeo Superstar
Strange Part of the Country - Conil
When I'm Here - Molotov Noir
Fire on the Bridge (Rac Maury Mix) - The Static Jacks
Lipstick - The Elogy
Paint It Red - Coco Electrik

TFMBME 23

I'm Sorry, But I'm Beginning to Hate Your Face - Eagle Seagull
Evangeline - Handsome Furs
Night Terror - Laura Marling
Arms Tonight - Mother Mother
Too Fake - Hockey
Daddy's Gone - Glasvegas
Nothing to Worry About - Peter Bjorn and John
Boom - Anjulie
I Know You Won't - Carrie Underwood
Over Now - Goodman Brown

TFMBME 24

No Time to Sleep - Tina Dico
A Story to Tell Your Friends - Every Avenue
Careless  Whisper - Seether
Soft - Kings of Leon
King of the Dogs - Iggy Pop
True Affection - The Blow
Don't Trust Me - 3OH!3
Rehab - Glee Cast
Don't Stop Believing - Glee Cast
Your Vegas - Your Vegas

TFMBME 25

Help I'm Alive - Metric
We Let Her Down - Chris Isaak
Told You So - The Guggenheim Grotto
Tell Me It's Not Over - Starsailor
Just Can't Get Enough - Depeche Mode
Back to Me - Kathleen Edwards
Fast Cars and Freedom - Rascal Flatts
Ghostts - Laura Marling
'Til Summer Comes Around - Keith Urban
Mr. Hurricane - Beast

TFMBME 26

Summer Nights - Rascal Flatts
Living Things - Peter Bjorn and John
I'm a Pilot - Fanfario




Current Location: Beffy's House
Current Mood: productive
Current Music: Bands Under the Radar #35

(Leave a comment)

May 26th, 2009


04:01 pm - Maybe It's Just Me, But...
SO, I'm enjoying my second full week of no school, and planning on going to apply for a job that I've been assured by three separate people who work there that I am most likely going to get the server job, and I'm watching "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days."  Now, normally, I love this movie; I love Matthew McConaughey and Kate Hudson, and they're adorable together and wonderful playing off of each other. 

But today, today is the day that this movie is kinda pissing me off.  Sure, they both go in with less than honest intentions.  Sure, she puts him through the wringer, acting all crazy and hilarious, and it is kind of a shitty thing to do, but there's really no chance of any long term damage.  He, Benny-Benny-Boo-Boo or Krull the Warrior King or whatever the hell you want to call that fine piece of ass, plans to make her fall in love with him.  For a job.  Not because he's already in love with her, but just to prove that he can.  Because apparently being extra smoking hot gives you a license to be a complete ass-hat douchebag that thinks playing with a woman's emotions is an okay way to spend 10 days.  He takes her to "couple's counseling," he takes her to meet his family; he does these things, which would indicate to even us normal, not crazy girls, that he actually is invested in having a real relationship.  What would have happened at the end of the 10 days if she hadn't been acting, if she had actually been that loony?  Now she not only knows where you hang out and live, but also your parents!  How is that a good thing?

And why does she have to apologize?  Her side of things never called for him to become emotionally invested in her; point of fact, it was the exact opposite, to drive him away as quickly as possible.  No harm, no foul.  But Ben acts like she is the biggest two-faced bitch on the planet, even though they both did what they did for their jobs.

This is how it should have happened:

Ben: "I can't believe you lied to me!"

Andie : "Me?!"

B: "Yeah, you!  You only used me for your damned article!"

A: "You did basically the same thing to me!"

B: "Yeah, but my job is more important than yours!  And I didn't try to drive you crazy on purpose! So, HA!"

A: "If it hadn't been for your bet, you would have dumped me on our second date like any sane person!  And wasn't your bet to make some poor unsuspecting woman fall in love with you in 10 days?  How does that make you better than me?  Actually, it makes you, like, a hundred times wore than me!  There was never supposed to be a chance that you would fall for me!  What were you going to do after tonight if you didn't actually like me?  'Hey, it's been nice, but now that I've gotten what I want, so long'?  I can't believe I thought for even a second that I could fall for you!  You know what my article is going to say?  'Sadly, I cuold not deliver the wisdom of what not to do when dating because the guy I picked turned out to be an asshole who wanted me to fall in love with him so that he could win a bet!  Ladies, beware of Benjamin Barry!  He has no concern for anyone's feelings but his own!'  You are an asshole, and I hope you choke on the damn lovefern!"

Seriously, though, he never apologizes to her, even though he was far more in the wrong than she was, on every single level.  He approached her, not the other way around.  She writes that article about how she fell for him, and how bad she felt about it all, and how wrong she was.  And it's really sweet that he chases her down and everything, but she put her humiliation and shame out there for all the world to see, her apology for her "bad behavior" for all the world to judge, and he never once says that he's sorry to her.  And she just goes back to him because she loves him, which is romantic, and stupid.  He chases her down and makes demands of her, and confronts her with the article.  That would have been the time to say, "You know how you said you were sorry for acting like a crazy bitch?  Well, I'm sorry, too, for attempting to play with your emotions."  That is what he should have said instead of the charming, "Bullshit" that he kept tossing out there.  You know what that says?  Charming assholes need not repent, but need only to be more charming so as to distract from the fact that they are still assholes. 

Boo on yet another movie where the woman gets a scolding and the man gets away fairly scot-free.  Even if the man is Matthew McConaughey.

Where's my "Thelma & Louise"?



Current Mood: bitchybitchy

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April 5th, 2009


08:17 pm - Hot Hot Hot!
So, I'm definitely not a lesbian, but the new Hardee's commercial with the chick from Top Chef is incredibly hot! It is, without a doubt, the sexiest thing I've seen in a long time. A sexy woman really enjoying a burger, REALLY enjoying a burger. GAH! So hot!

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